A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)

Ok so I haven't been keeping up with the latest on this reboot reimaging shitty thing. So you may ask, has my thoughts changed on this reimaging? Well yes, and it isn't for the better.

When I first heard about this Billy-Bob Thornton was up for the role. Now it seems that things have changed. First of all; the director is a music video director; why put such an important film in the genre to such an unworthy director? Was it because he was cheap? Or was it because you wanted Nightmare on Elm Street to look like an MTV music video? Seriously what were they thinking?

Inexperienced: Samuel Bayer

Secondly this film is again produced by Michael Bay. Why trust all these horror franchises to Michael Bay?! Why remake them? Ok Amityville Horror was actually a good remake, and the Texas Chainsaw Massacre was actually quite good too, and yeah Friday the 13th was better that a ton of the sequels, and I liked this Jason the best out of the previous incarnations of Jason. So I guess I could enjoy this flick.

Everyone loves to hate: Michael Bay

Scum

I suppose this could end up better than Nightmares 2 through 6, but probably not as good as New Nightmare, and of course NOTHING can beat the classic original Nightmare film. I'd be surprised if this film makes me think twice about sleeping.

So what's the good? Well the actor who plays Freddy looks like he could play a pretty creepy Freddy, I can't wait for the new make-up effects, apparently you can now see bones from where the flesh has completely burned through. The actor isn't too bad, but I'd say it's a step down from Billy-Bob. I guess I'll have to see his performance, but according to early script reviews there are NO "This is God" moments: These are the moments that worked so well in the original, this is what made Freddy so scary and menacing. On the other hand I've heard they've narrowed now the wisecracks to about two in the whole film, and apparently it's written to be more like the original Freddy. Another thing that caught my eye from early script reviews is that Freddy is back as a child molester, apparently raping Nancy as a 13 year old with a garden utensil, now if that's in the script: THAT's FUCKED UP.

Fucking Creepy: Jackie Earle Haley is the new man of your dreams.

Ok so Freddy doesn’t sound too bad: It might even paint him in a darker light, but I think I’ll have to see clips of the film, if not see the film to pass judgment.


Ok so now the stuff I’m not so keen on. Apparently this film starts with a teen party. The trouble is that EVERY FUCKING SLASHER FLICK HAS A TEEN PARTY!! Can’t they fucking break the mould and start with a really creepy beginning like the original had. Something that sucks you in like that odd and bizarre moment? This beginning is completely unoriginal and just popcorn junk.

The next is that all the characters are stereotypes, now It the original you did have stereotypes, but some were less subtle. Most of them were just ordinary teenagers trying to live out their every day lives. Now I don’t mind Nancy being a Goth chick, seriously, I really have nothing against Goth chicks, it kinda makes Nancy stand out more (despite being an intellectual smack in the face). I’m fine with that. It’s the fact that every one of her friends are stereotypes instead of having some true identity and personality traits, it looks like it’s all going to be done through characterisation, but through more visual imagery.

The next is something I’m battling between “is that god or bad?” some deaths and attacks are retained, but some have been changed, I know for some weird unexplained reason all her friends have had a name change, and now one of the most iconic kills in the film has been changed: Apparently the guy playing the glen type character gets killed by having poisonous spiders poured over him and he’s bitten/eaten to death. This isn’t as awesome or as iconic as the sequence when Glen gets pulled into the bed and fountains of blood just gush out of the hole in the bed, why change one of the best sequences in the original film? I mean they’ve kept the ceiling death, and the attack in the bathtub; why not keep the blood geyser?

So I suppose I should shorten and summarise what I think of the new Nightmare film so far? Well I can be honest to say that it will be better than Nightmare’s 2 through 6. Hey it may even surpass number 7 into becoming my second fav Nightmare film. There’s no way in hell you can get worse (actually there is: see Camp Blood for Details) than Freddy’s Dead: the Final Nightmare, and the character of Freddy seems to be a lot better than it was done in Nightmare’s 3 through to 6. BUT this said still doesn’t mean this piece of shit will even hold a candle to the first film. I’d be surprised if it made any new ground, and made this new series of Nightmare films worth seeing.

PS: Where is Nancy's Dad in all of this?