Resident Evil: The Darkside Chronicles (new screens)

Aside from the new Trailer, take a look at these screenshots. I can't find the website I found them on, but I'll make sure to credit them when I've found out!

Resident Evil 5

I got Resident Evil 5 yesterday.... A DAY BEFORE RELEASE!!!


Shame it was the 360 version....Now I have to wait a week or so to get it swapped at play.com.... >_<

Resident Evil: The Darkside Chronicles

Well after a while of "Nintendo Fans Will be very excited" and "We're making a new Resident Evil game exclusive to Wii"

We finally get a glimpse of what the most cynical of us feared. Yes another on-rails shooter. However this time they get to fuck up Resident Evil 2....

You see some fans were disappointed that Resident Evil 2 was not included in Umbrella Chronicles, where people like me were glad after what a god awful job they did with Umbrella Chronicles with the Resident Evil 3 scenarios that they didn't include the best selling Resident Evil game of all time: Resident Evil 2 (well at least not directly, we got a taste of Ada).

To be honest if they don't change the gameplay of Umbrella Chronicles, I can tell this game will be repetitive. The last game wasn't exactly top notch, they replaced most of the mood with action, and changed the plot hideously.

HOWEVER here's a list of things that could make Darkside Chronucles a real winner (even if it is on rails)

- House of the Dead. Ok when we think on rails zombie shooter, what do you think of? House of the Dead. We need zombies that you can actually blow apart and have fun with. If each zombie acts the same, then where's the replability? All we got last time were some heads exploding, and that was, um, that was it. Resident Evil 2 allowed you to at least blow a zombie in half!
We need zombies which you can blow in half, blow arms and legs off, blow guts out, and of course blow heads off.

- Easier head shots. Last time to get a head shot you had to be pin-point accurate to get a critical hit. Whereas in previous installments, destroying the brain would be enough, and I know that any bullet hitting the forehead would pretty much do that to a rotting corpse. I know Capcom wanted to add a bit of skill, but they can still add that, you can still have 'skill based' critical hits, and then just hits which blow their brains out. Getting pinpoint accuracy just took the player away from having fun killing zombies.

Better voice acting - Last time some of teh lines uttered in Umbrella Chronicles was just horid, maybe even as bad as Resident Evil 4! Now that's BAD.

- Not fucking up storyline. Right, I know they have to make most scenarios two player, and thus a need for two characters are needed. However Resident Evil 2 was supposed to follow two seperate storylines, I just know that i'm going to be saddened to see both Leon and Claire fighting at the same time.

More extras. Christ sake, the extras were appauling last time round. Give us a mercinaries mode or something. Like on CV:X we got a FPS mini game.

OK

So I'll keep you guys updated as soon as more stuff comes in about this game, but don't be suprised if it looks, and plays exactly like Umbrella Chronicles....

Boy Killed Anally by Office Chair

Ok, this sounds lie some title of some weird snuff fetish porn. But apparently a 14 year old lad in China was anally impaled by an exploding office chair.

The pressurised gas cylinder apparently exploded shooting deadly shrapnel up the poor guy's anus. Causing hm to bleed to death. Sounds like something out of Final Destination doesn't it?

Apparently the freak death was not alone where 3 people have died the same way in China in china since 2008.

While my heart goes out to the kid, and the kid's family, and it must be such a horrid way to go.. I can't help thinking of this as a Monty Python sketch. I mean how bizarrely odd, dark and funny. I can't help the inner child in me wanting to laugh.

I hope no-one is reading this at the office, or I recommend you work with a layer of kevlar between you and your office chair.

...Oh and...One more thing...

No I'm not talking about a new Columbo movie. I'm talking about the port of MGS4 for the iTouch/iPhone.

Never in my life would I have thought they would have soiled the name of Solid Snake by porting it on the iPhone!!!

I mean what were they fucking thinking?! First of all the graphics makes the epicness of the PS3 version, just lose all epicness, secondly that adding touch controls will make this one awkward piece of shit to play.

Kojima: Should be ashamed of himself

Now I've not programmed a game as complex as this, in fact I've only programmed in Basic, but what I do is create content, and I know it doesn't take someone with half a brain cell and a knowledge on gaming that this is a bad idea. Why didn't they make a M.G game that would be 100% customized to the platform? Something, I don't know? ORIGINAL?!

They could have called it Metal Gear Fuck Farts for all I care, just as long as it was an original title.

I don't want to swear here, but I'd rather see an announcement that it was going to be ported to the 360, at least that would be a platform more suited to MGS4, Christ on a Bike, fucking hell...

Inglourious Basterds

Well I watched the Trailer for Tarantino's version of Inglourious Basterds.



Well my Impressions?

Well the fact that it's just so fucking pro American when the American's helped in the last 2 minutes of the War just pisses me right off. However I feel that this might be a good Tarantino movie. The acting looks solid, and the style is impressive.

I just hope it doesn't end up as another Valkyrie. By which I mean self obsessive and so pro American that youre shitting American flags for 10 days after watching it.

Resident Evil 6

Well I was reading the brilliant Keith Stuart's Blog for the Guardian a while ago and I saw an article that said Resident Evil 6 is on it's way and it may be set in London!!

Along with the fact that Masachika Kawata said that Resident Evil 6 will be a turning point on whether Resident Evil turns back to Survival Horror or goes completely into Action Adventure. If it turns to Action Adventure, I'm definately abandoning the series. Resident Evil should be Horror, and Horror only.

I at least am happy with the fact that Kawata admitted that what I pointed out about RE5 was true, but he inteneded it to be a slow evolution, and now I understand that I can move on.

Hopefully Resident Evil 6 will be set in London, and bring back the Horror!!

Source: http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/gamesblog/2009/feb/02/gameculture-xbox